Geneva Elizabeth
Friday January 12, 2007 at 4:40pm
8lbs, 3oz 21inches long
...and beautiful!!

Eva arrived after a 4.5 hour labor, with few issues (she pooped before she was born and, like her brothers - had cord around her neck. And she had a fist to her chin when she came out, giving Mommy a nice tear). She has a "very slight" tongue tie. She latched on the first time and is breastfeeding like a pro!
Now that Eva is here, we are all getting used to our new dynamic as a family of 5. And I am cautiously optimistic that the depression I suffered after Cuyler's birth won't rear it's ugly head.

HERE SHE IS!

A few hours old:


And at home with her brothers:

Still here.
Still friggin pregnant.
Scheduled for induction on Monday at 8am.
Please cross your fingers I go on my own before then.


I think I figured out why I blog less than I used to.
Sean and I had taken a drive with the boys on Sunday. We were on the highway and passed a Rav4 with the license plate that said PFLAG. There was a rainbow sticker on the back bumper. On the passenger side window was a sticker with a rainbow heart, in it said "I love My Gay Son"
I said to Sean "Pride Overload! Is that weird? Is that like advertising your son is gay?"
Sean of course replied "I dunno..."
Then I said "Is it weird that we have an Autism Awareness ribbon on the back of the van? Are we advertising that we have a child with autism?"



The past few days I have been thinking alot about what I put in here. I'm at a point where I'm thinking about how what I write in here could affect him. How will he feel if he reads "I hate being his mother" years from now?
Part of me feels like I need to stop, out of repsect for him.
I have found that I write when I'm pissed off, or not coping well. And it's been helpful. But I'm not sure, as he gets older, how much I should write about HIM.
Part of me wants to veer away from autism being the centre and focus of this blog. There is so much more to him than his diagnosis.
There is so much more to our family than us having a child with autism. Sure it's a part of it...but as he gets older, I think I need to focus more on other aspects of our family - like Cam and his love and tremendous skill at hockey.
I'd like my writing to reflect Cuyler as part of our package - our family of 5. And not him as a child with autism.
I think this blog will evolve and be more focussed on the family as a whole. Especially with a new baby coming (if it ever decides to show up). Our family dynamic is going to change tremendously. This baby will affect everyone. I don't want to solely focus on how it changes Cuyler's life.
I started this as a way for me to express what what living with a child on spectrum is like. I needed to back then when I started it. We were fresh into the life of living with a child with special needs. I needed something. But I think I'm beyond that. I myself have evolved from that point.

My sister just gave birth to a miracle baby girl on Saturday (hell ya - I'm totally jealous!). Little Marley Sparrow. They live on in British Columbia. We live in Ontario.
I'd also like to utilize this blog to keep us in touch and posted on how our babies are doing. Post pictures. Post updates.

So...the content may change somewhat. I think that I may post more now that I'm expanding what I'm writing about.

I hope that the next post I write includes a photo of our new baby.
I want it out.
I want the boys to meet their new brother or sister.
I want to know if we have a new son or a new daughter.
I don't want to be pregnant anymore. I've never been this pregnant before. Cam and Cuy were both born on their due dates. So this is really frustrating.

Still here.
Still pregnant. 2 days til my due date...oy...

We had an eventful Christmas break. Cam had his first hockey tournament. I think in my last post he was playing net, but atthe last minute he decided he wanted to play out and score goals. Good thing too! (Click to enlarge)


I've officially become a hockey Mom. I just pray that I am not one of those obnoxious ones who cheer to the point of annoying everyone around me. I don't think so...not yet.
I also told Sean that if I ever wore a button on my jacket with his hockey picture on it, to remove it and poke me in the eyes with it.
They made it to the finals and lost by a goal. Cam played what was probably his best game yet. Very skilled and he supported his team by making some good passes. He had 3 major breakaways, but was stopped by the goalie. It was a fantastic (albeit stressful) game to watch. I had to keep reminding myself that these kids are only 5.
The BEST part of the whole tournament was at the end of the championship game, they annouced over the loudspeaker the "Player of The Game. From TimBits Bruins...number 9...Campbell Coleman!"
Oh
My
God!
He didn't score a goal, yet he got player of the game. Up in the stands I was floored. I think it was one of THE most proudest moments I have felt since becoming a Mom. I was just so happy for him. And Sean coaches the team, so it was really special for him to be on the ice with him throughout.
The ironic thing is - that wasn't the best part of the game for him. He'll tell you about 5 things that he thought were great about the game, then say "Oh ya, I got player of the game at the end."
He got a little puck for it, that was presented to him in front of the crowd (he got a good loud cheer - I loved it!):


and then the team also got a trophy for being finalists.


And...for good measure they put his name in the paper
BACKWARDS