Long time no blog...
Where to start?
How 'bout at the most prominent in my mind right now. My tooth. The back right molar. Second from last. It broke. So I have a big, gaping hole in the back of my mouth and it is grossing me out. One quarter of the tooth is just gone. And it's sharp. And I'm a little pissed about it. I had just gotten back from the pharmacy about to eat dinner (the boys had eaten while I was out). I was starving for the meatballs I had made for supper with my oh-so-yummy sauce. First bite in - CRACK. Ugh...I thought I was gonna barf. Now I can't eat or drink anything because it's like an open nerve. AND I'M HUNGRY!

The reason I was at the pharmacy was to get Cam's perscription for his medication. He has croup. Again. This is the third time he's had it. He had it at 6mos and exactly 1 year later to the day (Oct 6, 2001 & 2002) at 18mos. Both times we ended up at emerg. This time we waited it out.
We have both been up since 4am. I sent Sean to sleep in Cams bed and stayed up with Cam. At 4:30am we were sitting on the front porch trying to get some cold air into his lungs (it was -3C). That didn't work . So I tried his ventolin. That just made his heart race. Then a cough drop helped for very brief amount of time. Then a hot shower didn't do anything.
So we went to the dr this aft...and he said croup. Which surprised me because I thought croup affected little ones under 2. He said it could affect children up to age 6. So he got his meds, I gave him an epsom salt bath and hopefully we have a restful night.

When I got the to dr's I thanked him for getting me Cuy's birth records so quickly. We started talking about it. We actually spoke at length about it. I told him much of it I didn't understand, but what I could decipher was pretty interesting. And put alot into perspective. I didn't realize the perspective until speaking with the dr today.
You see, as I read things like dangerous decelerations, neonatal asphyxia, resuscitation, O2 bagged, cord wraped tight 4x, extreme difficulty cutting cord, viable male, flacid reflexes, born blue...
All of that made grateful for the little boy we've got.
I've always thought "Boy - we sure dodged a bullet" The autism that we're dealing with, is much different than what we could be dealing with.
But until my dr told me that the only records they knew of, of babies with a 4 cord wrap were stillborns. I had no idea. We didn't dodge a bullet. We've got a real live miracle.
He told me about how he remebered the day Cuy was born and how people in the hospital (staff) were talking "about that baby with the cord wrapped 4x".
I was also very aware of the emotion I could see in my dr's face while he spoke with me. He is genuinely involved and cares. He didn't even deliver Cuy (he doesn't do OB) but still feels connected and remembers when Cuy was born. It helps that his children are the same age as mine. And we are so lucky to have that care for our children and our family. It makes a huge difference.
I won't go on about it, but I could forever. I know it sounds dramatic. But I don't hesitate to consider him a miracle.

He's been a happy guy lately. Lot's of language. Tons actually. Asking for things using "I want".
"I want juice"
"I want cookie"
And when I offer him something he doesn't want, he shakes his head and says "no", as opposed to pushing it out of the way.
And!
AND!
AND!!
He's kissing me on the lips - ALL THE TIME! Mooo-wah!

With that I will sign off, starving and feeling yucky because of this fucking tooth. I go to the dentist tomorrow morning at 10:30. I'm terrified I'm going to lose the tooth. Ugh...can't think about it.
Need sleep.