For the past 2 weeks or so we've been getting some not-so-great reports from Cuyler's school regarding his behaviour. Lots of pushing, hitting, kicking...that is not acceptable behaviour - ASD or not. But that's where it gets tricky.
You see, the things that Cam would NOT be allowed to get away with and would most definately be disciplined for are the behaviours that we just can't seem to get Cuyler to understand are wrong. He doesn't seem to understand the discipline and when we try to give him a time-out or remove him from a situation - it can end in a 2hr tantrum.
I am having a difficult time lately as I get bigger with the pregnancy. He is a big brute of a 40pound kid and I am not always able to physically manage him like I was a few months ago.
We called in the behaviour consultant and she is going to observe him at school over the course of a few mornings and try to put a plan in place where the discipline and techniques are consistent with each person that works with him.

I was trying to figure out what could have prompted all of this negative behaviour. Any changes in his health, in his routine.
Then it occured to me while driving home from picking him up after yet another difficult morning for him at school today.
We have been trying to get him out of the static systems that he has put himself into (and that we've allowed). We're trying to make his world more dynamic. And it's been working.
For instance every night at bedtime for about a year we would read Cuyler the same 3 stories, in the same order. He wouldn't allow another book into the mix, or even mix up the order we would read them.
In the van, he'd freak out if we didn't a specific Wiggles dvd on.
Each and every morning he gets a buckwheat waffle for breakfast.
Kids on the spectrum live a very "static" life. With alot of "sameness". Very regimented, very predictable. Not varying the routine.
Very UNLIKE life.
Two weeks ago:
We decided no more dvd's or tv shows in the van at all. None. It took about 3 days of him asking and crying for "Wiggles Around The Clock!!". He hasn't asked in over a week.
At bedtime, we put those 3 books away and we made him choose new books. It took about 4 nights of him fighting for his other books and us telling him no. Now we read different books every night. Sometimes 1 book. Sometimes 4 books. It varies. Imagine that!
We have been trying to make his life and our house more dymanic. More changeable. We're hoping that if he's able to cope with these small changes (which were actually BIG for him), then he'll have an easier time managing in the real world.
That's big picture. Long term. It'll take a long time and it's what RDI will help us do. We're confident that "this is it."
And it's teaching us already how to push him (and to push ourselves) into more dynamic systems.
Already we see his langauge increase yet again. Sean and I both commented on that a few days ago.
He dropped something in the van tonight and got pissed off. He started a semi-tantrum and grabbed the back of his carseat and pulled the pillow off. He stopped tantruming and looked at his pillow - I don't think he knew there was a pillow there that could come off. Then said "Look Mommy! A pillow! Look!"
It was one of those moments that Sean and I gave each other "the look". The "omigod-our-kid-is-so-smart" look.
That thought would not have been processed and the words would not have come out of his mouth had the dvd been on.
And that he shared it with us...
Definately dynamic.

So I'm thinking that he may be feeling somewhat out of control as we make these changes at home and it's being manifested in these negative behaviours at school.
And now that we know a possible cause for the behaviour, we can hopefully deal with it more effectively.