I dropped Cuyler off at school today.
When he walked through the door a little girl and 2 little boys ran up to him and said "Hi Cuyler!" "Cuyler's here!!"
Do I need to explain how that made me feel?
I won't because I don't think I can articulate that emotion. I know that some of you who read this know the importance and significance of it. And you know that unexplainable emotion that I'm referring to. The "he's gonna be ok...we'll make it through this" feeling that comes over you when small (not so small to us) things like this occur. So the day started out good. Really good actually. Keep reading...

We're making progress. Poop progress. He has pooped evey other night (as opposed to every 3rd or 4th). Actually, he went Tuesday - and last night - AND this morning!!
Last night I did what any mother would do. I actually went through the diaper. Really really checking things out in there to see what was going on. And the first bit of stuff that came out was like hard rubber. I actually picked it up (don't judge me!) and the poop actually felt like a little hard bit of rubber. I couldn't believe that that is inside his body - poor boy. But it's working! I am so pleased that we're making progress in this area.

As far as the jacket...not so much...I bought a Wiggles keychain to put on his zipper pull to make the jacket less threatening to him. ( I bought this one...but recieved this one).
I put the (wrong) keychain on the zipper pull. He see's the jacket. He see's the keychain. He picks up the coat with his thumb and index finger, as though the coat is contaminated. I leave the room to back off him a bit, maybe let him get comfortable with his jacket...he walks out of his room, throws the jacket down the stairs and shows me the keychain. That is no longer attached to his jacket. The booger unhooked it from the zipper!!! He smiles and says "Wiggles toy!"

Yes, baby. You've got a new Wiggles toy.

Dammit...
On a positive note, the seller of the keychain told me to keep the wrong one they sent and they will send out a car keychain, asap at no charge.

Oh yes...and we recieved our "CSI" kit via UPS yesterday. We registered with ASD-CARC to take part in research studies that they conduct. So what we recived yesterday was actually a kit to collect saliva samples from all 4 of us to test our DNA. That's one of the studies they're working on. This should be an interesting part of the journey. I'm just glad that we're participating.

And I've been thinkng about Halloween. I've made the executive decision that Cuyler will not go trick or treating. He won't put his jacket on, nevermind a costume. He won't "get" it, nor do I think he would enjoy it. Knocking on doors and then leaving. Last year he ran into a strangers house, ran into their family room and started playing with their childs toys. I was so embarassed.
Plus, lately he gets a kick out of the doorbell ringing. When he hears it - he skips to the door and says happily "I get it!" I think he'd be thrilled having kids come to the door all night - albeit a bit frightening with them in costumes. But I think this is one of those occasions where we adapt to him and make it into something he'll enjoy, and not take him trick or treating because we want him doing normal things.
I'm starting to look beyond my need for normalcy and focus on his need for peace in his world.